When I named A Loving Spoon nut butters last summer, I had no way of knowing just how symbolic love and the heart would become in my life. (Once the full ‘A Loving Spoon‘ website launches, I’ll tell you the story behind the name, too.)
Fast forward about a year. I’m in a much different place than I was last summer, but last week before we headed to Disneyland and during our trip, I was reminded of the heart, of love.
On Tuesday morning I had to bring Samarah to another Pediatric Cardiologist appointment. This time it was just a follow up. When she was born the doctors made note that some part of her heart may not have fully formed. A few weeks after we got her, we had a Pediatric Cardiologist appointment. They told us that it looked like everything would be normal. This follow up appointment last week confirmed that, but during the ultrasound the doctor thought for a moment he saw something else. My heart dropped during those few minutes. In the end, they concluded that she was perfectly fine.
Her heart was perfectly fine.
We have finally been assigned to our adoptions case worker, and later that day (last Tuesday) she came over to meet us, to meet Samarah and to give us an update. Awhile back I told you that we’re in our 120-day wait. These 120 days end mid July. That date will be critical, and we will find out that in another 90 days beyond that she will be ours forever or it could take up to 11 months. The amount of time this has all taken is hard, very hard, but she gave us so much hope that day. We found out some information regarding the case that we have been hoping for.
It seems only logical that our hearts will be perfectly fine (in due time).
I never knew this kind of love – these emotions around hearts – until Samarah came into our lives. (Yes, that is her and her daddy at the Disneyland Post Office. Too cute.)
When you have bottled up love to give a child, but no child to give it to the heart begins to fall a little flat. I remembered this on Saturday night when it was just Samarah and I in the lobby of our hotel in San Diego. I sat there with her in peace and quiet and felt so very, very fortunate to finally be on a vacation with a child.
Samarah has grabbed onto our hearts in ways we never imagined. Waiting for her to become Samarah Josephina Hoffman might still be a long battle, but Ryan and I would wait for her little heart forever.
And it’s true, this story – our story – will always read…..
(And somehow, in some funny and odd way, I believe that God placed the name “A Loving Spoon” just perfectly in my head. My dreams for the brand go far beyond a jar of peanut butter or other nut butter. The dreams seep into an entire place of pure love.)
Love your guts,